While reading Zami, I first failed
to acknowledge that I had any personal connections to Audre Lorde experiences
at all. And that’s where I made my first mistake. I personally do not think
that there is anyone who could not relate to the themes found in this book.
As young adults and college
students, we take this time to explore things we’ve never gotten to explore
before whether that be with drugs, sex, music, clothes, knowledge or any type
of experimentation you’d be interested in. We make mistakes, and we learn and
grow from them (or you don’t). With these next chapters, this is exactly what
Lorde seems to be doing. Lorde seems to struggle the most with her isolation
during her youth but grows confidence and acceptance as she grows older. Going
to college, moving out, getting a job, Dealing with the suicide of her first
love Gennie and carrying the memory of her where ever she goes, Getting
pregnant at a young age, Having an abortion, the list goes on and that’s what I
feel is so beautiful and connecting about Audre Lorde’s writing, she allows you
to connect with her experiences. She creates this person who deals with so many
obstacles and you can’t object or hate her for it because the experiences are
so real!
As a gay boy, I expected to read
this book and find very minimal connections to any part of this book and I was
completely wrong. Audre Lorde just continues to capture my attention with these
life experiences or moments that are filled with such emotions that are just so
real you just cant pull away from the book. This is by far my favorite book of
the semester and I look forward to seeing how this ends.
On a completely different note, I
found a very small detail within the book that I found very interesting and I
wanted to get different opinions on what the possible reason for certain
spelling choices Lorde makes within her biomythography symbolize. I first
noticed in chapter 10 page 69 that the word America was spelled with a
lowercase “a” instead of a capitalized one and then reading further she does
the same with the word America. She only does this with America, when she
mentions any other country, she will capitalize the name. I just found this
very interesting and I formulated a possible reason but wanted to get other
opinions.
-Johnny Benavidez
-Johnny Benavidez
JOHNNY. I noticed that as well! She also doesn't capitalize "united states", which I also found interesting. Maybe she's always felt disassociated with America since it never gave her any possibilities and never treated her like an actual citizen. Also Chapter 24 was interesting in that regard where she talks about not really fitting in and always being an outcast. So maybe it has to do with that.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with what you said in your post. I totally have experienced all of those things multiple times, and it definitely shapes us as a person. I also felt really bad for Audre and her multiple loves lost, but I understand what she's going through. It's always the first love that we'll never forget, no matter what, and Audre describes this feeling perfectly.
I have to say personally I like her childhood years better because they were a tad more engaging, especially chapter 11, but I really can't wait to see how this ends.
I agree with Daniel. I think she feels a disconnected to "A"merica as an African American because the first thing that comes to mind is the different cultural aspects that people have whether that be race, location or emotion. Even earlier in the book she feels as though she's an outcast and different from others. So I think thats why she doesn't capitalize it because its not something she personally "capitalizes" on. I also believe her reasoning for not capitalizing "united states" is due to her not believing that the united states is truly "united" as a whole.
ReplyDeleteAs a college student, I can appreciate that situations in her story, although they may not be completely her's, they are completely honest and true. From her earlier years to her later years, she makes everything detailed to where we as readers can either feel it because we have experienced it or relate to it because we know someone who has experienced it. The description of her wanting to explore her playmate's body and her trying to figure things out for herself are all things we can relate too. So I'm excited to too see how things end as well. Interpreting this book is fun lol
I think Daniel and Cherokee have done a great job exploring her lack of capitalization of America; I noticed it as well and have to admit it was becoming a little grating. Upon reflection though, I think I only felt this way because I wasn't truly acknowledging the injustices she had to face growing up. The brief news flash given on page 172 that states "McCarthy was censured. The Supreme Court decision on the desegregation of schools" gives me hope that by the end of the book, she might feel connected enough to America to capitalize it, but only time will tell.
ReplyDeleteThe theme of isolation continually appears throughout the text. To me, her not capitalizing her own native country is a crushing declaration to be independent of it. It seems a lot of her isolationist trends were learned from her mother who at one point the narrator says appeared to believe that if she ignored anything she didn't approve it, perhaps it would just go away on its own. This has always been such a counterintuitive argument to me; if you aren't going to do anything to affect change, what good is sitting by, pretending problems don't exist, and isolating yourself from the world? This has devastating consequences for her mother once the father dies as her mother no longer has any support to turn to. I really like that the narrator appears to try to work for change to prevent the Rosenberg's execution. However, once her effort appears to be for naught she becomes despondent.
Nevertheless, there has been definite character growth throughout the novel, particularly evidenced by the interactions in her intimate relationships. Hopefully by the end she will have advanced enough to leave her isolationist tendencies behind.
Johnny, I completely agree with everything you've pointed out in this post. The very detailed account of Lorde's life is interesting in the fact that she is able to capture your attention as well as make the story relatable (because she is so detailed in her story telling). I have found myself in these pages one too many times, which I think makes it all the more better of a reading.
ReplyDeleteI too noticed she doesn't capitalize America and thought to myself, much like Travis pointed out already, that maybe this is due to the injustices she encountered growing up in Harlem.
I feel the same way Johnny. I was surprised at how much I related to Audre Lourde in this book. Especially when she talks about feeling isolated and alone and awkward. I think everyone feels this way at some point, especially when transitioning into college. There are so many people and so many things going on, you are no longer in the safety net of familiarity. As for the "america", I found this interesting too because I am reading another biography by Assata Shakur who was a Black Panther in the 60's-70's. When writing about the justice system she uses all lowercase for "court", "america" and anything relating to federal titles. It was her way of representing that she did not have respect for America at the time due to so much social injustice.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I'm starting to believe, more and more, that it's just wrong to approach any of these readings with the thought in mind that I won't be able to relate. I have had this thought so many times, and it's detracted from my enjoying the first few chapters/pages of each sample. If anything, this class has taught me that literature provides everyone a way to relate, even if on the lowest human level. Take, for example, how I felt about Langston Hughes and his work--that I had no way to relate as a white, female, lesbian. But then I read his poem Narcissus, and was so moved that I completely retracted my disassociation. I feel like it might be much the same with the non-black gay male readers for Zami. True, I'm not black, but I can relate on other levels. I figured, as Jonny said, that there might be more perceived distance between the men in our class and the text. But then, also as Jonny pointed out, I there is always something that can bring in the reader. I think Audre's experimentation is that key element to which most young people can relate.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the lower case "america" goes, I agree with what most people are saying here. I get the sense that Lorde is a bit of a socialist, considering how concerned she is about the McCarthism running rampant in the country. Join that in the injustice she faces as a gay black woman and I can see why she wouldn't have the rosiest view of the U.S. This probably is reflected on her stripping the respectful capitalization from the country's name.
Much like most people on here, I also felt I would be unable to relate to Zami. Yes, I'm black. But my childhood was nothing like hers. As I continued the reading, whether I connected to her or not became a completely moot point. Her stories were riveting to me. Although they may not have been completely true, I felt as though Audre was a friend of mine. Like we were just relaxing as she shared her stories of Ginger and how she became a "slick city kitty" overnight just by association of her hometown. The ease in which she writes her stories and the straight-to-the-point mentality that she writes with sometimes left me going back and thinking, "Wtf?" because there was no build up to these situations. Just a blatant, "I never saw her again". Even as seen with the little girl in the first part of the book. And for the rest of the book, I thought about that little girl at random intervals.
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of that day we all started making connections between this class and our other ones. Its so funny how someone else's situations can be completely opposite from your own, but aspects of whatever they're going or went through can be very similar to your completely different situation. As I read over different sections again I still find new connections.
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